Gospelbound: Authoritarians Think More Control Means Less Churn

The tagline TGC created for Gospelbound claims it offers listeners “firm faith in an anxious age.” Of course, it does nothing of the sort. Instead, it offers the usual authoritarian blahblah from the most toxic elements in their entire end of Christianity. I’ve saved the most alarming of that blahblah for last: their oh-so-very Calvinist plan for churn reduction. They think more control over congregants means less churn from their churches. Today, I’ll show you what that means — and why it’s such a laughable contradiction of the supernatural claims of authoritarians.

The Jesus Beatings Shall Continue Until Salvation Improves (Only God Can)

Lately we’ve been talking about the horrible Christian movie Only God Can. In it, we encounter a great many tropes beloved of evangelicals. And one of their very favorites–said on that Zorg voice of course–involves how they see their god engaging with humanity. See, he’s got a novel approach to winning friends and influencing people: he destroys their lives till they bend the knee. Yep! Today, my friends, we look at the Jesus beatings that shall continue until salvation improves!