I want to introduce you to Christian leader Bill Gothard. He’s got a folksy good-ole-boy crooked smile. He’s at just the right age where an old white dude gets a lot of cachet in certain fundagelical circles, and he’s a rock star in the homeschooling/”purity culture” crowd. And he’s also Read more
Valentine’s Day is coming up, and with it, a middle-aged married person’s thoughts turn to love. I’ve changed a lot regarding how I think about love and relationships. It’s astonishing to me to think about some of the bizarre notions I used to hold about how to conduct a good Read more
I used to hate Sundays, but I love ’em now. No fuss, no muss, get up when you like, putter around in the kitchen, make coffee, read news at a leisurely pace, catch up with my phone games, write, watch movies, do fun consenting-adult stuff if possible.. it’s a nice Read more
A social experiment is technically just an experiment run on people, to study how groups relate and react to things. The term is also used more informally to mean a poorly-thought-out, self-serving conceit that gets pushed onto an unwitting and unknowing group to enact. Typically the idea is that the Read more
After I deconverted, my husband was convinced that I’d change dramatically. I wanted to talk a bit about that, because I see that same fear playing out among the other ex-Christians I’ve met. (PS: Hi guys! You’re up kinda late, aren’t you?) Since it’s the New Year, it’s that time Read more
One thing that seems to crop up in the news over and over again are the constant struggles between America’s secular government and increasingly-secular citizens, and that particular brand of over-controlling zealotry that masquerades as religion. Scores of lawsuits have been filed trying to stop this overreach on topics ranging Read more
Long ago, Charles Babbage came up with designs for a machine that could accurately create tables of calculated numbers. He called this machine the difference engine. By turning a handle on the machine, gears and cranks would turn and it would calculate rows and columns of numbers in tables–the sort Read more
I love bad advice. I admit it. I’ve always had a huge affection for bad advice snark. I mean, bad advice is engineered to cause maximum grief, drama, and division, especially when you know the original advice-seeker actually wanted to hear that bad advice, and that’s all part of the Read more
One of the hardest parts about deconverting out from under a fundagelical marriage was unlearning my indoctrination and re-learning all the rules for how men and women should interact. One of those ideas I had to unlearn was the idea of “dying to yourself.” But it was the one I Read more
(Content warning: lots and lots of sexism directed at Yr. Loyal Correspondent, but I’ll spoiler this shiznit now by telling y’all that this unhappy tale ends happily.) When I was very young, I saw how my mom and dad operated as a couple. I saw that my mom worked full-time, Read more